Tag: loss
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Snuffleupagus
According to Wikipedia, Mr. Snuffleupagus from Sesame Street is a large, furry creature belonging to his own unique animal species called a Snuffleupagus. He looks like a cross between an elephant, a woolly mammoth, and a dinosaur. I can relate, Snuffy. I was tall as a Freshman in High School, so the feeling of being a lumbering mammoth rang…
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Nature
The outdoors is good for my soul. The more time I spend just existing outside of our home, the more in touch with myself I feel. I’ve mentioned before that I kind of lost the identity of who I was outside of the duality of our relationship. Every decision, every day, opens a new door…
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Reflection
Many years ago, I worked as a Portrait Photographer for Olan Mills Portrait Studio spending my day photographing singles, couples, and families for over 2 years. It was very much a dream job for me, especially when I was managing the studio in Renton, Washington. One day, we had a client come in who had…
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Codependency
Codependency in relationships involves becoming so invested with each other that you can’t function independently. I didn’t realize that I had become codependent initially, I just assumed that it was part of being a loving spouse. As the other person starts to falter due to age related pain or mental illness, the other side of the…
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Beginnings
I didn’t want to change. I was satisfied with the way it was going even when things were hard. I was comfortable with how things were – even with all of the drama that comes with mental illness. Each one of us, Mel and myself included, had some form of mental trauma that we’ve been…
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Sleep
… is what I didn’t get much of last night due to the heat. Tonight, much like last night, it is almost 10 pm and still over 80 degrees Fahrenheit. I do not have AC in my room, so I was not able to get to sleep last night until around 2:30am. With a good…
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Hope
My first introduction to this word came from the name of my first school, Hope Lutheran School in Seattle, Washington. It started out as just a word associated with my education but I soon discovered what it meant to hope – and the reasons why it was important. At that time, I hoped that I…
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Discovery
I see dragonflies everywhere. Mel got a tatto of a dragonfly on her wrist a year before she passed – and so we made sure that one was on her urn so we could remember that animal connection that she had created. Since her passing – I see dragonflies everywhere. Wether it is getting buzzed…
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Rejuvenation
By definition, Rejuvenation is the act or process of making someone or something look or feel young, fresh, and energetic again. Ever since Melanee’s passing, I have not been able to shake the feeling of being overwhelmed and under pressure to do a lot of things even when no one was pushing. Kind of a…